Tuesday, October 5, 2010

You know I learned something today...

Before I dive into Season 2, here's an overview of Season 1:

Life Lessons:

It's okay to ditch your wife at her mother's funeral reception as long as you apologize with a wedding ceremony at the end of the day.

It's okay to threaten to force a girl into your car as long as you tell yourself it's for her own protection.

If you are bitchy to your father's girlfriend, your daughter will be hit by a car.

If someone is harrassing you, you will not get in trouble for assaulting them.

Marijuana will ruin your life.

The best way to help your sister quit drinking is to lock her in your bedroom until she agrees to rehab.

If you steal a $2 glass, you will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law, unless the entire school confesses to a similar crime, in which case there will be no punishment for anyone.

Romances:

Matt: 6

Mary: 3

Lucy: 1 (but it's Jimmy Moon)

Simon: 1

Ruthie: 0

Trauma:

Annie's mother died in their house.
Aunt Julie assaulted Simon.
Matt and Annie were robbed at gun point.
Matt crashed into a cop car.
Matt was arrested for stealing.
Matt was harrassed by Annie's best friend.
Mary was sexually harrassed.
Mary was hit by a car.
Happy was hit by a car.
Lucy and Jimmy broke up. (Though their dating was probably more traumatic for the audience.)
Annie's father brought his girlfriend to visit.
The grandparent's nearly lost their adopted son.
A neighborhood church was burned in a hate crime.

Maybe the subsequent insanity of later seasons can be explained by post-traumatic stress.

7 comments:

  1. Wait, did someone do pot in season one? I know there was a season 2 pot episode...

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  2. Yeah, in Saturday Eric was counseling a teen who'd skipped out on his rehab program, was living on the streets, and nearly got killed by the end of the episode.

    http://7thheavenrecap.blogspot.com/2010/08/saturday.html

    The most awesome pot episode is the season 2 one. It should be coming up in four or five recaps.

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  3. This blog is hilarious. Seriously, how does all this stuff happen to one family in one year? I love how your most used tag is 'Over involvement in family members' love life'.

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  4. The family also dates a LOT for people who really hate premarital sex. I don't see anything wrong with dating OR premarital sex but it's so odd that the Camdens see only one is okay. Like, spending all your time obsessing over your girlfriend/boyfriend is fine, kissing is not fine but not a sin, but then as soon as you have sex, it's EVIL? If you're that conservative wouldn't you hate the idea of your daughters dating at all, for the most part?

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  5. I think Eric does hate the idea of his daughters dating. Though he's pretty encouraging of Matt dating.
    I also think part of the issue that will become apparent in later seasons is that too much emphasis on not having premarital sex leads the kids to rush into marriage. Which strikes me as a bigger problem frankly.

    @ Michelle, so glad you found my blog.

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  6. This reminds me of this one time my brother and I were watching an old episode of Life Goes On (for whatever reason) and he was like, "Oh my god. If all this shit really happened to any family they'd be fucked up forever."

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